I remember it like it was yesterday. Falling asleep so high, sweating like crazy, cold feet, & legs shaking. I thought this was just how I was. I never thought that taking these things could cause such a title wave of side effects.
It was the summer of 2012. I came back stronger than ever after my surgery. I honestly thought I was unstoppable, and then.... I wasn’t! Just a few short months after being married we moved from our basement apartment into our newly remodeled 3 bedroom 2 bath home. It was our first real place together, and we loved it!
I had taken things for pain almost all my life, however, I was never the one in control, and now I was. It wasn’t long before things started to get out of hand. I started to see my life spiral down hill. My business wasn't being managed well, my marriage was failing, and my body seemed to be following in the same direction.
I needed a lot at this time in my life, and money was one of them! So what did I do? I did what any druggy would probably think to do, I sold my pills. A couple of months passed by and I had justified myself from taking my pills and selling them, to smoking marijuana and selling it as well. At one point in my life I felt I had control, but now it had control of me, 10 fold! This life was crazy. I had already once overcame the life of being a druggy and drug dealer, but for some reason I guess I needed to return.
The thing that sucks about this lifestyle is you never know who your true friends are. People hitting you up just to get high and people always around because you provide. The pills were just as bad, people knew that I had both hips replaced, so of course I would have pain pills. People always lead with the “I don't have insurance and I cant afford them”. So what do I do, hand them out like candy on halloween. I never looked at it for being a bad thing, I was justifying that I was really helping someone. If your doing this, note, that its just as if you were selling dope, so don't get caught.
Not long after I had been giving a friend part of my prescription, his wife killed herself because she suffered from pain and depression. I always remember him saying to me “ can I have some more bro, my wife uses all mine so I never have enough”. How crappy did I feel after she killed herself? REALLY CRAPPY! Knowing that some of the pills that I gave him possibly went towards her making that decision. I could hardly stand myself!
After this experience I found myself in a deep depression of my own. Now instead of giving or trading the pills, I was taking them. 2 giant sodas, 2 energy drinks,4 Percocet 10’s, 2 adderall 30’s, and 2 Oxy 15mg all in one day. This was all prescribed to me. I cant believe Im still alive! The sad thing is, i didn't even know i was addicted. I thought that because it was prescribed to me that it was ok. Its not! I honestly forgot who I was. Finding myself has been one of the hardest things I have ever done. I pretty much have to teach myself how to love again. Being emotionless for over 4 years is a hard thing to come back from. Not to mention, I was high the whole time I was getting married because I had just had my operation.
Long story short, Im back and IM going stronger than ever. I know there are millions of americans going through the same thing. Prescription drugs are common place, and they shouldn't be! Think for a minute, pain, anxiety, stress, these are all things are bodies do when something needs to change! And all we do is take a pill and wait for the next thing we can take to cover up our next symptom.
Trust me, I know how it feels to be in pain. However, I now know what its like to be pain free as well. I started focusing on my diet and exercise, dropped 35lbs and bam, the magic happened. I still have my double hip replacement, along with the same life but I'm pain free and giving back! You can do it to, we all can! Im sure we all know someone who has this struggle.
Don't think that its not your place to step up and say something, it is your place! They need help! I can tell you one things for sure, your not going to find them out and about, your going to have to pull some crazy 007 stunt and get into there house, because they’re most likely going to but cuddled up in a dark room sleeping.
They honestly don't know how to help themselves. I know this because this is where I was, and if it weren’t for my amazing wife that pushed me through, I would be dead from a suicide attempt that failed. These pills are no joke, we need to make a stand. Lets make a move and stand in this together! Im here to help, so please, please, please don't hesitate to get ahold of me. I will go into anyones house to save a life, just let me know where and when, and I’ll be there!
I love all things Health & Fitness. I love to write & make people laugh. I love sports & all things outdoors. I am here to help & serve in anyway possible & I am so grateful for your love and support. Haters are also welcome.