I remember it like it was yesterday. Falling asleep so high, sweating like crazy, cold feet, & legs shaking. I thought this was just how I was. I never thought that taking these things could cause such a title wave of side effects.
It was the summer of 2012. I came back stronger than ever after my surgery. I honestly thought I was unstoppable, and then.... I wasn’t! Just a few short months after being married we moved from our basement apartment into our newly remodeled 3 bedroom 2 bath home. It was our first real place together, and we loved it!
I had taken things for pain almost all my life, however, I was never the one in control, and now I was. It wasn’t long before things started to get out of hand. I started to see my life spiral down hill. My business wasn't being managed well, my marriage was failing, and my body seemed to be following in the same direction.
I needed a lot at this time in my life, and money was one of them! So what did I do? I did what any druggy would probably think to do, I sold my pills. A couple of months passed by and I had justified myself from taking my pills and selling them, to smoking marijuana and selling it as well. At one point in my life I felt I had control, but now it had control of me, 10 fold! This life was crazy. I had already once overcame the life of being a druggy and drug dealer, but for some reason I guess I needed to return.
The thing that sucks about this lifestyle is you never know who your true friends are. People hitting you up just to get high and people always around because you provide. The pills were just as bad, people knew that I had both hips replaced, so of course I would have pain pills. People always lead with the “I don't have insurance and I cant afford them”. So what do I do, hand them out like candy on halloween. I never looked at it for being a bad thing, I was justifying that I was really helping someone. If your doing this, note, that its just as if you were selling dope, so don't get caught.
Not long after I had been giving a friend part of my prescription, his wife killed herself because she suffered from pain and depression. I always remember him saying to me “ can I have some more bro, my wife uses all mine so I never have enough”. How crappy did I feel after she killed herself? REALLY CRAPPY! Knowing that some of the pills that I gave him possibly went towards her making that decision. I could hardly stand myself!
After this experience I found myself in a deep depression of my own. Now instead of giving or trading the pills, I was taking them. 2 giant sodas, 2 energy drinks,4 Percocet 10’s, 2 adderall 30’s, and 2 Oxy 15mg all in one day. This was all prescribed to me. I cant believe Im still alive! The sad thing is, i didn't even know i was addicted. I thought that because it was prescribed to me that it was ok. Its not! I honestly forgot who I was. Finding myself has been one of the hardest things I have ever done. I pretty much have to teach myself how to love again. Being emotionless for over 4 years is a hard thing to come back from. Not to mention, I was high the whole time I was getting married because I had just had my operation.
Long story short, Im back and IM going stronger than ever. I know there are millions of americans going through the same thing. Prescription drugs are common place, and they shouldn't be! Think for a minute, pain, anxiety, stress, these are all things are bodies do when something needs to change! And all we do is take a pill and wait for the next thing we can take to cover up our next symptom.
Trust me, I know how it feels to be in pain. However, I now know what its like to be pain free as well. I started focusing on my diet and exercise, dropped 35lbs and bam, the magic happened. I still have my double hip replacement, along with the same life but I'm pain free and giving back! You can do it to, we all can! Im sure we all know someone who has this struggle.
Don't think that its not your place to step up and say something, it is your place! They need help! I can tell you one things for sure, your not going to find them out and about, your going to have to pull some crazy 007 stunt and get into there house, because they’re most likely going to but cuddled up in a dark room sleeping.
They honestly don't know how to help themselves. I know this because this is where I was, and if it weren’t for my amazing wife that pushed me through, I would be dead from a suicide attempt that failed. These pills are no joke, we need to make a stand. Lets make a move and stand in this together! Im here to help, so please, please, please don't hesitate to get ahold of me. I will go into anyones house to save a life, just let me know where and when, and I’ll be there!
Hello there soon to be not Adderall users! Lets get a few things straight. First, I don't know every little thing there is to know about Adderall, however, I do know this, I freaking hate it, it ruins lives, minds, marriages, along with anything and everything it comes in contact with. And second, If your someone who thinks that it's actually a good thing and that it really helps people ha, well, for one, I'm sorry and two, just stop reading this right now because you wont agree with me anyway, and I wouldn't want to waste your time. What I would do though, is refer to a book titled You Are The Placebo by Doctor Joe Dispenza, and find out just how powerful you really are! You might just discover the true and unlimited power you were blessed with, and guess what the best part is, it lies right between your ears! Even for those who choose to continue to read, you really need to check out that book because its freaking amazing, it changed my mind, and better yet my life. Second, don't deny the problem at hand. It's ok to have problems, it's ok to struggle, however, whats not ok, is lying to yourself. It's something we all do and it's so stinking bad. If you have an addiction, but you really say you don't, your really tricking your mind and only making it that much harder for yourself to ever tell the difference between whats real and whats not. I know this, I did it for 4 years straight, with multiple addictions. We can not continue to deceive ourselves if we want to change. People are not stupid, they know you are struggling. If your never hungry and have blood shot eyes 24/7, chances are your on something, and its not natural.
In The Beginning - "I Have Never Felt Better... Not!"
I remember my first time taking Adderall. It was like I just experienced what is was like to feel unstoppable. I thought to myself "I will never give this stuff up". I was hooked! It started out with just 5mg. This felt like more than enough, however, just a few short months and I was already at 60mg per day. Not only was I taking 60mg per day, I was also following that up with 2 or 3 energy drinks and a couple sodas. It didn't matter what it was, my body craved those stimulants, and I was showing no signs of stopping. It only took that few months before I really started noticing some really crazy side effects. At first the doctor said that they it was normal, but after I realized what was really happening, I started to take things into my own hands again. That amazing feeling I thought would never end, not only did it end, it turned into a massive decline. I was no longer myself, I hated being social, I hated working out, I hated being around my wife, and I even hated eating, who hates eating??? haha That whole thought that you actually feel good on Adderall is such a lie. Everything about these pills is a lie. Who you are when you are on them is a lie, and who you become after you take them for awhile is for sure a lie. If being depressed and having the worst case of permanent Brain Fog sounds good to you then just keep doing what your doing. However, if becoming more brilliant, more focused, and more dedicated than ever before sounds better, lets dump those things out and join the movement getting and staying clean!
Adderall Side Effects - Short & Long Term
How to Know When to Quit
I love all things Health & Fitness. I love to write & make people laugh. I love sports & all things outdoors. I am here to help & serve in anyway possible & I am so grateful for your love and support. Haters are also welcome.